Monday, July 21, 2014

Seizures: Harbingers or Heros?

A thought has been bouncing around my head for quite some time. It spawned when I spilled water on my laptop. My computer instantly shut down. Well, that's it, I thought. Of course it was finals week, and of course I didn't have recent copies of my 20+ page papers stored anywhere else.

To say the least, I freaked out. I tried every method of resurrection the internet had to offer. 48 hours later, I succeeded. Turns out, my computer shut down instantly for a reason. It detected the water and saved itself from further damage by pulling its own plug.

My "insight" came that night. (By the way, I am not a doctor so this is purely speculation). What if my seizures were acting like my laptop?

The computer/brain analogy has always fascinated me and this was not the first time I considered the relationship between my episodes and a circuit board. But this was the first time I considered it a positive thing. Could it be that my brain detected some external, or internal, threat and reacted with a seizure? Could seizures provide be some long-lost form of defense mechanism?

I reacted this particular way because no doctor knows what causes my seizures. I do not have a tumor, nor other illnesses that accompany my disorder. The seizures consume my entire brain and are thus not related to any specific regional abnormality. My brain just goes haywire.

So, is it possible that my brain senses a threat, actual or perceived, and responds with a tonic clonic episode? Could it be like a fever, dangerous but necessary to kill off an infection? This is not to say that what is happening isn't a malfunction. But it's nice to think of my epilepsy as a helper, an unsung hero, than as an indicator of illness.

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